Dynamic Communication
The second chapter emphasizes on Communication as a continuous process of exchange of information. Communication becomes effective when the messages are interpreted similarly at both ends. If the messages are not decoded on common grounds, conflict and misunderstanding take place. Dynamic communication is a building block of a good relationship although it works differently in different relationships. Like my husband believes less words means better understanding, and I love communicating endlessly. Even then I can rate our communication style pretty open and dynamic except when it comes to conflict. Because when it comes to conflicts he plays by only one rule, which is “My way or Highway.” I generally give up in heated conflicts and let the angry, person take over as anger shuts down all chances of thinking wisely. Besides too much clash spoils the wellbeing of the house. So when everyone has calmed down, I prefer to explain my opinion. So even if I don’t win the argument, I at least put forth my say on it, to maintain communication fluid.
I really like how you point out that in communication conflict arises when messages are interpreted differently by both parties. Messages can be interpreted many different ways and when misunderstanding takes place, conflict is soon to follow. I agree with your approach to handling conflict with your husband. Since he has the “ my way or the highway” attitude disagreeing with him would only cause conflict. I like how you lead him to believe that he’s right and wait for an appropriate time to state your opinion. This is an effective way to still communicate your opinion, while at the same time avoiding conflict.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to your situation as I have a friend who maintains a "my way or the highway" attitude during conflict, regardless of the context. This makes it very difficult to disagree with her on anything, as she is rarely willing to view the situation from a perspective other than her own. As a result of this, I tend to avoid having conflict and confrontations with her at all costs. I realize, like you, that it is hard to reason with someone who is always insistent on being right and having the last word that it is not worth my time or energy to fight a pointless battle.
ReplyDeleteYou used a great example of how your husband thinks less words means better understanding, and you on the other hand love communicating endlessly. I believe that if both parties do not understand the communication in similar ways then there will be conflict. Both have to agree on a common ground.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to your experience with your husband because my boyfriend and I also disagree on many things. I appreciate your patience in being able to walk away and let everything cool down before you speak your mind. That is one of the hardest things to do in a relationship because we usually just want to get our point across and be right.
I love your writing style. It is very cohesive and really clear. Your second sentence has to be my favorite line. Although it is such a broad statement, it is so true. In order to avoid conflict, messages have to be passed both ways similarly and received understandably. The funny thing about it is that conflict is actually easier to avoid than we think. If we simply abide by that statement alone, conflict with our relationships would lessen. Just as you and your husband fight and have conflict, so do I. Arguing pointless battles can deride many issues as well.
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